Biblical references to Hemorrhoids (Emerods)

The Ark of the Covenant

In biblical times, being smote with an affliction of Hemorrhoids or "Emerods" was considered an appropriate celestial punishment for high sins and misdemeanors.

Jehovah did not like unauthorized eyes casting glances at the contents of the Ark of the Covenant which reputedly contained the stone tablets on which the 10 commandments were written, along with Aaron's rod and a golden jar of manna.  This happened a lot when the Philistines captured the Ark at the battle of Eben-Ezer where the Israelites were defeated with the loss of 30,000 men.  Curiosity about what was in the box got the better of the victors.

When bad things started happening to the smitten Philistine's bottoms, they were happy to return the Ark to it's rightful (Israelite) owners.

I dont think prepH was widely available during that tumultuous era.  A salve of milk and honey would have done pretty well and may have stolen some of heaven's thunder, IMHO.

 

The LORD will smite thee with the botch of Egypt, and with the emerods, and with the scab, and with the itch, whereof thou canst not be healed.”

Deuteronomy 28:27 (KJV)

 

9 And it was so, that, after they had carried it (the Ark of the Covenant) about, the hand of the LORD was against the city with a very great destruction: and he smote the men of the city, both small and great, and they had emerods in their secret parts.

12 And the men that died not were smitten with the emerods: and the cry of the city went up to heaven.

1 Samuel 5:9&12 (KJV)

 

4 Then said they, what shall be the trespass offering which we shall return to him? They answered- - “ five golden emerods, and five golden mice, according to the number of the lords of the Philistines: for one plague was on you all, and on your lords.”

5 Wherefore ye shall make images of your emerods, and images of your mice that mar the land; and ye shall give glory unto the God of Israel: peradventure he will lighten his hand from off you, and from off your gods, and from off your land.

1 Samuel 6:4-5 (KJV)

Author
Marcus M. Aquino, MD Marcus M. Aquino, MD Surgeon

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